Category archives: Trust

When You Wonder What the Cold Days Are Good For

The weather has turned cold on me and I've become this shameful wimp, preferring the warmth of the great indoors to the adventure of the great outdoors. We haven't gone out in three days. I think that's a record. I'm not exactly proud.  But, my artist friend tells me that there are so many good things about the cold and winter coming. She tells me how everything has it's own season, and the cold is for tucking in and being more still and quiet and for making art. She says it's when the creatives get all creative. So, I look forward to that--making art. And I've got this book writing project, so I've taken a little time each day to craft with words. It feels good, to look out my window and see the sun but still feel warm in here, all tucked away and eager to create.I've felt [...]

When You're Just Plumb Scared and Want to Feel Safe

Some days, fear has this grip on me. Anxiety and worry take its toll and I find it hard to breathe. I can feel it in my skin, literally. Every once in a while, I get the shingles. Shingles isn’t just for old folks, apparently. Shingles can happen to worry warts, too. But, I’m a child of God. A little girl who belongs to a Great King. A Great King who never worries about a thing because He’s the biggest and the strongest. And I’ve got these promises. “The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” (Deut. 33:27) “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble…The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.” (Psalm 46:1,7)So, I run to my Refuge and I hide in my Strong Tower and I just sit still and remember what I’ve got in Him. I[...]

What I Do When I'm Afraid of Life

Sometimes I get afraid of life. I can't explain all the reasons why, but I just kinda go through these spurts or seasons when I'm more prone to be fearful of things and my heart feels fragile and I have a hard time roping my imagination in.And it's strange because it's something that happens on the inside of me and I'm finding that it has nothing to do with what's going on, on the outside of me. Like, today for instance. Today is the most lovely, breezy, warm, full-of-light kind of day. And there's nothing in my life to be afraid of. At least nothing that I can see. But, for whatever reason, I have a lot of what-ifs running through my head, and before I know it, I'm plumb sceered! Scared of the world. Scared for my kids. Scared of what could happen in my life. Just scared. And I don't like[...]

When It's Hard to Put Your Wounds Away

I dreamed a dream.My friend was in a prison cell. She stood there, eyes looking down, face against the wall, and she was all alone. All her growing up years, her mama was a yeller and when she did something wrong, her mama screamed and came running with those angry eyes and she hit, fists pounding. And this friend, she'd just brace herself, while the blows came, bruising up her back and etching scars into her soul. And my friend's heart grew tough like leather, so she sewed it up to keep the pain from leaking out and the rage from seeping in. Or so she thought. I loved my friend and I missed her so I went down to that prison cell to see if perhaps I could get her out. I found the door was open, just barely open, but there she stayed. So, I went in to that cell and I took her hand. I gently[...]

Addicted to Color

We're addicted to color around here. And lately, we've been coloring everything. We color our eggs and our cream of wheat and our ice cubes and our cheeks and our shirts and our paper and our patio and pretty much anything we can get our hands on. We like color. Color makes everything so colorful. God must love color, too. Because He colored the whole world with it. Even the galaxies. Did you know the galaxies are different colors? Breathtaking colors. And underneath the sea, way down deep, there's all these colors, too.  I mean, He could have made everything black and white and we never would have known. But, He didn't. He made all these shades and hues and they make life brilliant and vibrant and nice to look around at.Do you ever wonder if God has a favorite color? Because it seems[...]

Jars of Clay

Tomorrow I do something that I've never really done before. I speak in front of a group of women. I was told there would be like 80 people there. And it's a brunch so there will be delectable delightful food, I'm sure, and everyone will be eating and chatting and then at some point they'll all be staring. At me. And they'll expect me to say some funny things. And some profound things. Something moving. Something touching. And quite honestly, I'm scared. Like, the kind of scared that makes you feel like laughing yourself dizzy because it's so absurd. (Gulp.)Photo creditSo, I've been talking to God a lot about it. Been saying things like, "Uh...Lord HELP!" and "What was I thinking?" And "Please somehow help me make sense and help me not care too much that everyone is staring and just help me[...]

She Dances

She dances. Her so small and yet somehow she knows how to sway to rhythm. I could say that I taught her but I never showed her that move. She tilts and twirls and smiles and whirls. She dances because her joy wells and though she's little, she's unafraid. I could live like that. Light steps. A twirl here. A spin now and then. A wide happy grin. This knowing—that though I’m small and not in charge, I’ve got a Heavenly Father who holds all things together. This whole wide world. And me. And He is kind and He is good.  And this world He is redeeming--it’s why He sent His Son. So we could dance. Our whole life swaying, twirling, spinning, to the rhythm of His grace.

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