Oh, hi there Kitty! Remember me? I’m back! Yeah, I can tell you feel sad because you were really missing me. I was thinking about maybe I should pet you s’more.

But, I remember what happened last time. All I did was tickle your paw and pull three whiskers from your furry cheeks and I nearly lost a finger. And half my face.

So, I got this gourd…

(Waves gourd)

See this? Now, just keep your eyes on this gourd. Gourds are nice. Gourds are not creepy at all. Hold still, it’s gonna be so fun, just you wait and see.

Easy does it. Slowly, slowly…keep thinking happy thoughts.

You know, stuff like, baby chipmunks, peanut butter, tuna from the can, me just holding your tail going for a walk…no wait. No. Forget that last part.

Just stick with the happy thoughts. Happiness all around you. Happiness in your heart.

Yep, you’re good, I’m getting closer….closer…

(Tap, tap, tap.)

See, Rascal, that wasn’t so bad, was it?

MOM! You’re not gonna believe this. Rascal LOVES getting pet with gourds! Just LOVES IT!

See, I can tell because I still have my hand!