Perhaps it's mostly me, or mostly a "woman" thing, or mostly a "human" thing, but one of my greatest struggles each day is wondering if what I'm doing is important. The conversation in my head usually goes something like this: "Am I doing the right things today? Does this thing matter? Should I be doing something else? Now, why am I here again?"It isn't long before the day becomes full of activity, and I stand wondering if time has been squandered or if I've invested in the things that matter most. The good news is, I can talk to my Creator about these questions in my heart and He is near enough to hear me. And He answers. Isn't it comforting that He answers? And here is how He answered me today:I am the Vine, you are the branches; If a man remains in Me and I in him, he will bear much fru[...]

Hey, hey, it's my BIRTHDAAAYYY! (That was meant to be read very loudly and obnoxiously.) I'm actually mimicking a friend I used to work with, who upon every return of his birthday, would yell this out to anyone passing by so they would surely know this day was set apart...for him. Today I'm celebrating 30 years of life. 30 marvelously beautiful, sometimes hard, but mostly deeply satisfying years of living. A dear friend asked me today what my name meant. And the meaning of my name actually depicts a lot about my life, so I wanted to share it with you. I’ve heard that Magdalene has two meanings. The first is “prostitute," which is interesting because my birth mom was a prostitute and as a little girl, I had many thoughts that I would grow up and be the same. (I vividly remember lots of[...]

Today, I'm proclaiming the praises of Him who called me out of darkness into His marvelous light.(2 Peter 2:9)I woke up and my heart was heavy with the cares of the world and with the burden of myself. I had exerted very little energy, and yet I was so tired and worn down.But I looked to Him, who calls me out of dark thoughts.I praise Him because He changes the way I see.He opens my eyes to see beauty in the ordinary.He gives me purpose in the mundane.I think of Him and my heart is glad.Tears of sorrow are followed by tears of rejoicing.I move about in light because He made me a light dweller.I sit still.I taste and see that He is good.I drink deeply from His Word.I am whole again.Basking in light.I was empty but now I'm full.So, I proclaim the praises of Him who called me out of darkness[...]

After I listen to his muffled tired sobs for a little while and he finally gives in and falls asleep, I wait just a little longer till he's good and out...Then I sneak in and tiptoe around the toys just to peek over the crib to see him there.I like to see him there, all still and quiet and peaceful and oblivious and at rest.His chubby thighs...his soft little feet...his crazy mess of hair.And for some reason, I get this hilarious feeling in my gut and I start laughing and have to run quickly out of the room...Or, I get this ache and I start to cry because he's so peaceful and he's just a little guy and I want it to always be that way.The peaceful part...no worries...no fears...just sweet rest.And I pray for him.

One year ago today, my life forever changed. Something indescribably wonderful happened--Gideon came to share life with us.I remember that first slippery moment when he was handed to me. So tiny, so perfect...and he was ours? I loved him right away, but I was terrified. Whatever would I do with him? He was so warm against my chest and I was so scared. I swallowed hard. And prayed...Jesus help us!Those were such fragile moments...the first time we drove him home, the first time we gave him a bath, the first time we took him to the store...didn't anyone see how frightened I was? Surely they could read it all over my face.I laugh now at our awkwardness. Probably the funniest moment was our first party. Normally, I would have walked in smiling big and making friendly conversation...but not tha[...]

I would like to tell you about a personal journey I'm on. It's a journey from fear to freedom. With each new day, the One who loves and cares for my soul, brings me one step closer to freedom. Oftentimes, however, my steps are so feeble and small that I hardly notice any progress at all.Photo creditOne of my fears is the fear of man. That is, I'm afraid of what others think of me. To be blatantly honest, I crave approval, acceptance, affirmation. I want you to like me, to think well of me. And I'm afraid that you won't.Photo creditI'm afraid that I will say or do something that will cause you to think less of me. Or perhaps to just downright dislike me. Horror of horrors...you may even reject me. Lash back at me. Cut me out of your life.Photo creditAnd while I know that all these are norm[...]

Today the sun came out to play. So, when Gideon laid down for a nap, I bundled up and sat in a little spot up against the house, soaking in all the warmth.I've never yearned for spring this much--it must be these northern winters.The sun-filled days are few and far between, but not one of them is taken for granted.I try to look for beauty in the bleak. There is a loveliness about old things passing away and the promise of new things coming.But a girl can only take so much wither and decay.So today, I sought out some life...And I found it, there at my feet, as I sat quietly in the sun.And when I find life, I have to gather it up. So I found a bucket......and some tools for digging.(This is what you use when you can't find your spade.)Here's the dirt. I tried to be poetic about the dirt but [...]

I committed to one more post from my poetry days, so here it is.However, before I share this last poem with you, it begs a bit of background.As some of you know, I was adopted when I was a little girl. You can imagine that life before I was "rescued" was unsettling, to say the least. As a teenager, I had a hard time processing those early years. I wondered why God allowed certain things to happen. There were wounds and I struggled to understand why.My Mom introduced me to Jesus the same year her and Dad adopted me. I learned that He was kind and loving and merciful. But still there remained this question deep within. If He was truly kind, if He was truly loving, if He was truly merciful, then how, how could He allow such awful things to happen to a little girl who couldn't protect hersel[...]

I came across some old pictures the other day that brought back some very pleasant and funny memories. See these care-free kids? That was us before this guy came along. Actually it was us before we were married. You know, when I was still dressing pretty and wearing make-up all the time and when we used to go on dates like every other night. (Note to self…Maggie, you really should stop wearing your favorite sweat pants every day. And it wouldn’t hurt to wear make-up a little more often…)Anyways, there’s something you should know about this night. So, if you’ll just stay seated for a few minutes, I would like to recount to you a funny story. Perhaps it all began when I watched Anne of Green Gables for the first time, or maybe I was just born a free-spirit, but I’ve always enjoy[...]